Personal Accounts

Sex vs. the Super Bowl

A Super Bowl blackout  is one of those privileges that I think that only single women can carry off.  No play by play, no chili cookoff, no morning after cleanup.  When you are in relationships the big game is just a part of the package.  Actually, for some households, any and every sports event seems to slip comfortably into your schedule, as naturally as Saturday morning shopping.   I recall getting our second television set during NHL playoffs the second year my ex and I lived together, so that I could have other viewing options on a Saturday  Night.  Funny, I didn't fully realize how integrated Professional Sports was in my life until I found myself living on my own again, and without my effort slowly tuned out all the hype.  I considered myself a tomboy who loved all sports, and I even lived in a Super Bowl city and got wrapped up in all the excitement.  In the end I came to discover that I really am not all that interested in professional sports.  Perhaps I need to start putting money on the game to rekindle the spirit.  As Homer Simpson explains to his daughter in an earlier Simpson's episode, it what makes sports interesting to dads.

Still, as a Type A Channel surfer it is tough to bypass the game, so what to do instead?  It was by chance  this weekend, coincidentally after buying three pairs of shoes, that  I happened across the new DVD release of Sex and The City Season 6, Part II.  The collection that wraps up all the story lines of the show.  What peaked my interest is seeing the three alternate endings and how they compared to the version that was broadcast.

I do have a history with the show that involved a past flame.  He loved the show as much as I did, had a silly theme song dance, and saw himself as Steve, not good enough for the girl...me.  The love faded (I guess he really wasn't good enough) but my ritual of watching the show didn't, and when it airs late at night, a special treat.  And tonight, the night of over marketed hype of a sporting eventwith a typically uninspiring game tossed in, a welcome companion.

It may seem odd to buy a collection of TV shows, but considering the mature content this particular show doesn't really translate well into reruns outside of HBO, and the extras make it worth the second look.  And the fact that The three alternate endings?  To keep the press off the trail, three coffee shop endings were filmed, and another "kissing bridge" scene. 

The real gems are the commentary voice overs, writer's discussions about the show, all focusing the strong sense of responsibility the show has always felt to keep true to their characters, true to single women.  In spite of the scale of show, the message behind the show has always been that "single" does not mean unwanted any longer. The new single is selective about finding a relationship and has a fabulous time exploring the options.  A good message for all us.   That, and not having to watch each play by play on Super Ball Sunday, makes this a great day.

Get Your Own Copy

Sex and the City: Season 6 Part 2

Foresaking All Others

A small group of family and close friends gathered on a frigid winter's evening to celebrate the marriage of two souls brought together in love, the second time around.  The glowing bride floating amongst the guests, the groom attempting to curtail the antics of the step siblings happily scampering haphazardly amongst the adults, the ex respectfully watching from a distance, a new mother quietly nursing in the corner.  The most touching part of the event was that the groom's mother, an ordained Anglican Minister, married the happy couple.

It is easy for the young to demonstrate such warmth, optimism and joy on this occasion.  It is far more remarkable for those who have loved and lost before to regain their faith in their ability to love and be loved.  The heart is a remarkable muscle and faith and optimism in humanity a remarkable trait. 

Having loved and lost myself I still find it remarkable and somewhat puzzling to see my close single friends find love and chose to marry.  I joke that I feel like Joey from Friends, so much change.  I guess I am just not the marrying kind, too smart to marry, perhaps.  It is closer to the truth that I just don't have faith in the institution itself, as an increasing number of singles are confirming.  Considering the high divorce rate, a marriage is no longer the guarantee of happiness, of happily ever after. 

Weddings make me sad.  The optimism of the wedding ceremony, of friends pledging to provide support to the happy couple too often fades.  It is sad that so many men and women who soulfully pledge to "foresake all others" in a legally binding contract find themselves in a divorce court a few years later.  That the same friends and family who gather for the happy occasion, secretly hope that this time it will work out, this time happiness is attainable, sustainable.  To my friend that is my dearest wish...

Some Women are Too Smart for Marriage

Perhaps single women are not just looking at the issue of being single from the proper perspective.  Perhaps the issue is not that you haven't found the right man; rather you are just too smart for marriage.  The next time you are needled by a prying aunt or other married busy body, here is some amunition to stop them in their tracks and give you an ego boost as well.

A recent British study, to be published in the Journal of Personality and Invididual Differences, comparing one test group over a number of years, from primary school to middle age.  It appears that clever men are much more likely to marry than those with lesser intelligence.  However, for women the opposite is true--intelligent women are less likely to get married.

The study was based on 900 men and women whose IQs were measured at the age of 11 and who were then revisited 40 years later to find out if they had ever married.

For boys, there was a 35 percent increase in the likelihood of marriage for each 16 point increase in IQ.  For girls, there was 40% drop for each 16 point increase.

For smart women, this really doesn't seem like much of a surprise, and we especially understanding why smart men would figure out how easier their lives are with a dutiful spouse to look after them.

The Skinny on Office Romances

With the office Christmas party on the horizon, you might have been thinking about the office romance.  I met my ex at work and it worked...for awhile, so check out an article on MSN about dipping into the office supply pool.

Brent Turnbull

How many trips to the supply room can you take before that hot girl notices you passing by? Although office romance isn't new, statistics show that more and more people today are mixing business with pleasure.

A January 2002 survey done by Dr. Janet Lever for Elle magazine found that 92 percent of the 31,000 men and women surveyed admitted to finding coworkers attractive and flirting with them. Furthermore, 62 percent had indulged in at least one office affair (nearly half while married or in a committed relationship), 42 percent admitted to having sex on the job, 16 percent said it took place in the boss' office, and 7 percent were caught in the act. A whopping 66 percent felt that employers should have no say in who they date.

These numbers aren't surprising. Given the long hours that people work, opportunities to meet singles outside the workplace are shrinking. In fact, today's workplace may be to dating what the singles' bar was in the 70s (minus the disco ball and bell bottoms). Even so, if you decide to date a co-worker, there are some things to consider before taking a plunge into the office pool.

Company Policy
Companies are far more tolerant of workplace dating than in the past. A study by Vault.com, a workplace and career centre, found that 87 percent of employers have no problem with employee dating as long as work doesn't suffer. Inconspicuously find out if your company has an intra-office dating policy (this doesn't mean an Alias-style break-in to the HR offices). Generally, it's best to steer clear of romantic relationships with supervisors or underlings, as there may be legal implications both for you and the company if the relationship ends badly.

Be Discreet
If co-workers sniff out your relationship, you could end up living in a fishbowl where every move with each other is scrutinized. Do yourself a favour and keep it under the radar. "I'm dating a more senior person in my company," says Susan, a 30-year-old Seattle-based consultant. "If I spend the night at his house, he drives me 45 minutes across town for a change of clothes so that no one gets suspicious at work the next day." Set ground rules about office interactions (no passing love notes in meetings, or harmonizing "Endless Love" together in the lunchroom), and leave your personal life at the elevator.

Perception is Reality
If you aren't discreet, be ready to deal with the negative perceptions your relationship may create. A junior-senior relationship may cause co-workers to perceive favouritism, even where there is none. If you get or give any sort of advancement, there will be whispers. Even stopping into one another's offices or meeting accidentally in the copy room can cause some behind-the-back sniping.

Job Performance and Advancement
Being in love can be distracting, so imagine that feeling when the person is sitting in the next cubicle or down the hallway. If you're working on the same projects together, this can be magnified even more. Your company will have little tolerance if your job performance suffers as a result. This type of behaviour may also be remembered when the company is handing out promotions or downsizing.

Can You Handle the Breakup?
If the relationship ends, how will you feel seeing that person throughout the day in the hallway, lunchroom and at the water cooler? Also consider that right now you only see their very best side (well-dressed, well-spoken, well-mannered) as they try to act professionally and impress co-workers. Once the break-up strips away this veneer, you may find a different sort of person underneath, and you'll have to live with that reality every day.

Warning: Office Romances Can be Harmful to Your Single Status
This article is not meant to put a damper on office dating, just to give you some pool safety rules before diving in with both feet. The office is a great place to meet like-minded singles, and relationships born there can be quite successful. A study done by the AMA (American Management Association) found that 44 percent of office romances lead to marriage. That's right, look around you. Your future husband or wife could be collating next to you right now. Don't say you weren't warned.

What to Eat Before A Date

While not yet recognized as a major powerhouse in the online-dating game, Lavalife has developed a loyal following for us winter bound Cannucks who like to party.  Spawned from its live phone dating service, Lavalife is definately not a site for those looking for marriage, but if you are young, like to meet people to the point of hyper-dating, you should check out the site.  The also give the niftiest dating advice.  Who knew that pumpkin soup quiets the little self-doubter in you?

by Kelly Jones

There's nothing worse than feeling icky when you're supposed to be heading out on the town with that guy or girl who might just be The One. You want to make a good impression, pull out the sass, and show your funkiest side.

Thankfully something can be done for that bummer of a mood. (Yes, this miracle solution is legal.) Although still in its infancy, research has shown that certain foods can make a difference in how you feel about yourself and the people you connect with. Beware, however, not all foods can lead to emotional bliss. It's equally important to avoid foods that can bring you down or zap your drive.

Mom Was Right
Everybody knows it's important to start the day with a wholesome breakfast and eat at regular intervals to stay healthy and maintain energy levels (avoiding wonky highs and bummer lows).

You might also know about serotonin, the body's natural feel-good hormone responsible for mood, sleep, inhibition, and appetite. It turns out that avocados, bananas, brown rice, cottage cheese, soy protein, tomatoes, turkey (highest level), and walnuts all boost serotonin levels.

Feeling Bushed
I wish I felt like that guy in the Viagra commercial. I'm never going to make it through the date feeling like this.

Grab some protein! Even that backup can of tuna will do if you don't have access to the fresh stuff. Beans, chicken, cottage cheese, egg whites, lean beef, nuts, soy products, and yogurt also all have kick. Apples (containing boron) and lentils (high in iron) can help keep you alert too. And then there's the great advice we rarely sufficiently practice: drink lots of liquids. Equally important for keeping sprightly is avoiding high-fat foods, which take longer to digest and draw blood away from your brain (i.e., giving you the spacies).

Stressed Out
What's a lunch break? I forget. I think my shoulders are touching my ears.

Next time you're stressed, consider indulging in fish, like mackerel, trout, and tuna. Certain fruits and vegetables work too. Try blueberries, cherries, strawberries, grapes, alfalfa, cauliflower, celery, green leafy vegetables, shitake mushrooms, and tomatoes. And wash that all down with some de-stressing liquids, like water or a steamy cup of tea (green, lemon, chamomile, ginger, peppermint, and rose hip).

Anxious
What to wear? I'm late! Where's my taxi?

Ain't anxiety great? Frustratingly, most researchers suggest staying away from alcohol, cakes, chocolates, coffees, and ice cream. Grrr. What's left? Try sticking with the calming carbs, like corn, dried apricots and cherries, rice, sweet potatoes, whole grains, whole-wheat pasta, and yams.

Dwindling Self-Esteem
I wonder why they aren't calling back? Maybe I shouldn't have told them about my third nipple.

Turns out that pumpkin soup can help give you the emotional boost to override that drooping confidence. Also enjoy beans, corn, small amounts of plain popcorn or sweet potatoes, squash, and whole-wheat grains.

Pissed Off
I can't believe they never called back! Maybe I should start a nasty rumor.

A safer bet might be to reach for a grapefruit. High in pectin, grapefruits seem to reverse the effects that anger has on the body. And salmon has shown to help alleviate crankiness. Although tempting, stay away from sugary foods when you're feeling peeved.

Blame it on science
And then there's chocolate. Oh so good. Biology made you do it, really.

Cocoa acts like an antidepressant by stimulating the central nervous system, heightening and arousing mood. Sounds dirty. Of course, too much and the whole thing falls apart.

Final Word
Although there's no guarantee that eating a can of tuna before going out will keep you awake until the after-hours party shuts down, it's nice to know that you have a partial say in how you feel about yourself, and, in turn, about the people you connect with. So next time you're in the mood for food, think food for mood.

Diet Tips for Getting yourself into the Right Frame of Mind before Your Dates.

Common Sense Dating Advice for the Holidays

Some useful advice from our friends at Match.com.  I think it is particularly important to remember it is better to be on your own for the holidays than with some for the sake as a temporary fix for lonliness you might be feeling.

By Randy B. Hecht

'Tis the season to be in a relationship ... or be acutely aware that you're not in a relationship. From thoughts of romantic gifts exchanged under twinkly lights to the pressure to be with a special someone on New Year's Eve — which fast forwards in what seems like a matter of seconds to pressure to exchange romantic gifts with a special someone on Valentine's Day — this can be a difficult time of year.

It doesn't have to be, though — even if you're not paired off at the moment. There are plenty of others out there who likewise aren't spending this holiday season as half of a couple. There are plenty of parties on your calendar. That gives you ample opportunity to celebrate, have some fun and maybe meet someone new. Here's how to make the most of your holiday dating season:

Travel safely. The streets are slippery and everyone is in holiday rush mode, which is not the ideal combination for getting from place to place. Give yourself a little extra time to get there, walk and drive slowly and carefully, and arrive in one piece.

Watch your waistline. With all the goodies to try at all those parties, it's easy to end the season with a midsection that looks appallingly like Santa's. Try eating a low-calorie, high-bulk meal before you go out in order to curb your hunger and control your appetite for all those cookies, chocolates and other treats.

Put a cork in excessive drinking, too. Nothing wrong with a Champagne toast, a cup of eggnog, some beer, wine or your favorite cocktail — in moderation. Remember, alcohol can make you say and do things you'll regret when you sober up, especially if they happened at the office party, in front of a camera or behind the wheel of a car.

Baby, it's cold outside. Yes, you want to wear that shoulder-baring dress and strappy high-heeled shoes ... but it's freezing outside, and that's before you consider the wind-chill factor. Either re-think the outfit or find a way to slip unnoticed out of your snowgear and into full party paraphernalia. Even the most fashion-conscious among us can be felled by the flu.

Go ahead, talk to strangers. Meet new people at parties, ask your friends to help you find fresh social connections, search for dates online, and so on. Make plans with the ones who catch your fancy. Just practice year-round common sense and make your first meeting in a public place.

Don't make desperate decisions. If it comes to it, you will survive a solo holiday season. And being a single in a group of friends as the new year rolls in beats being alone with someone who was the best you could do under the circumstances.

Have fun! Enjoy the music, the gift-giving, the company of friends and the spirit of the season. Say "I love you" a lot. Imagine a better, kinder, more peaceful world. Give yourself the once-a-year indulgence of believing in magic — and hope that life will reward that belief by steering a little magic your way. Happy holidays!

Link to Mentioned Sites

Match.com

Hyperdating: Speeding up the Courting Process

A recent article provided to Lavalife members explores how online dating has had an impact on the way that many singles are now approaching the mating process, with good and bad points.  More selection and choices, but very hasty judgments, making first impressions even more important than ever.

Hyperdating: How Online Dating Speeds Up the Courting Process

By Lisa Daily

A friend of mine usually has five or six dates a week with guys she's met online. Is she a tramp? No, actually, she may be an old-fashioned girl by today's dating standards. Many online daters are setting up as many as ten or more dates per week, sometimes two or three a night. Welcome to the fast-paced world of hyperdating.

Contrary to what you might expect, most hyperdaters aren't slutty, sex-crazed players looking for a hookup. In fact, many daters use hyperdating as a way to speed up the traditional dating process in order to find a meaningful relationship.

Many people who date online have sharpened their online dating skills down to an exact science: The scenario goes something like this:

You meet online. Something sparks and you find yourself emailing back and forth like a couple of lovesick teenagers. She shares her traumatic frog experience from the fourth grade, he confesses that his favorite song is "Wind Beneath My Wings." Before you know it, you're trading photos, rapid-firing IMs, and setting a date for coffee/lunch/drinks. You finally meet in person, decide the chemistry just isn't enough to overcome your previous knowledge of his/her cat collection/persistent underemployment/sketchy wardrobe and you end the date before the waiter has a chance to bring a check. Or, there is a spark, and you bond feverishly over your previously established adoration of canned ravioli/ Graham Norton/tarot cards. In which case you finish your Apple-tinis (certain you've found your soulmate,) and head back to your place.

We swoon over the profiles of bankers and car salesmen the way we used to pore over the details of TV heartthrobs and rock-n-roll frontmen in the latest edition of Teen Beat.

Unfortunately, looking for something meaningful can be a challenge in the convenience-driven world of online dating. Why settle for less than romance novel perfection when there is a full menu of replacement dates as close as the nearest Internet connection? And, with the introduction of mobile dating (dating via cell phone) on the horizon, industrious daters could be hooking up with someone new while their not-so-fantastic date is in the restaurant bathroom.

Dating has been transformed from ten years ago when a "date" meant drinks, dinner, a movie and maybe a kiss on the doorstep. Now, it's the 30-minute mini-date. Friday night date night may still mean drinks, dinner and a movie, but now, it's with three different people.

The Good News and Bad News

Here's the good news about hyperdating: Thanks to the magic of romance technology and round-the-clock man shopping, you can cram 15 years worth of dating into a mere 37 months.

The bad news: You may be so numb from chronic over-dating that you fail to realize when Mr. or Ms. Right finally crosses your inbox.

More good news about hyperdating: You can learn from somebody's profile what would have taken grandma five dates to glean in a traditional dating process.

The bad news: Too short, too lazy, too undereducated. In a slower-paced social setting you might take the time to get to know someone who wouldn't fit your ideal profile, somebody bad on paper and great in person. In the efficiency –driven world of hyperdating we make snap judgments based on height, job description and pet preference. Like a Lexus salesman who passes over the millionaire with the scruffy jacket and torn blue jeans, a shopper that doesn't look like he can make the payments doesn't get offered the test drive.

Lisa is author of Stop Getting Dumped!

LINKS

Stop Getting Dumped!

Lavalife

Love is a Drug, so Enjoy the Buzz

Like so many single woman, friendship is an important support system for me.  My single male friends, in particular, come in handy not only for the more banal aspects of life, like handy man jobs, but for the more social aspects for to participate in activities where "plus one" is far more enjoyable. 

So it came with some shock in the past few weeks, that not one, but two platonic male friends have fallen into the depths of love and will be shortly walking down the aisle.  Having become fond of not having to share my space with a significant other, it appears strange that they would so abruptly leave the club of the unmarried, but to one I replied, "love is a drug so enjoy the buzz".  And actually that is not far from the truth.

Love is a Drug

Elation, mood swings, sleeplessness, and obsession—these are the tell-tale signs of someone in the throes of romantic passion. In the new book, Why We Love, renowned anthropologist Helen Fisher explains why this experience—which cuts across time, geography, and gender—is a force as powerful as the need for food or sleep.

Why We Love begins by presenting the results of a scientific study in which Fisher scanned the brains of people who had just fallen madly in love. She proves, at last, what researchers had only suspected: when you fall in love, primordial areas of the brain “light up” with increased blood flow, creating romantic passion. Fisher uses this new research to show exactly what you experience when you fall in love, why you choose one person rather than another, and how romantic love affects your sex drive and your feelings of attachment to a partner. She argues that all animals feel romantic attraction, that love at first sight comes out of nature, and that human romance evolved for crucial reasons of survival. Lastly, she offers concrete suggestions on how to control this ancient passion, and she optimistically explores the future of romantic love in our chaotic modern world.

Provocative, enlightening, and persuasive, Why We Love offers radical new answers to the age-old question of what love is and thus provides invaluable new insights into keeping love alive.

And How Long does Love Last?  How about the Seven Year Itch?

In a recent 20/20 program, Ms. Fisher was interviewed about the myth of the Seven-Year Itch. Is there anything to the belief that spouses are most likely to feel the urge to stray after seven years? Actually, according to evolutionary anthropologist Helen Fisher, it happens a lot sooner, and the reasons for this may go back to the dawn of humanity.

"As it turns out, the standard period of human birth spacing was originally four years. We were built to have our children four years apart and I think that this drive to pair up and stay together at least four years evolved millions of years ago so that a man and a woman would be drawn together and stay together, tolerate each other, at least long enough to rear a single child through infancy," said Fisher.

Following the urge to find a new partner after that four-year period, she says, may have been a way that humans added more variation to the gene pool.

So there is an itch — it's just a four-year itch, according to Fisher.

"People around the world tend to divorce during and around the fourth year of marriage," she said.

But what about the myth of seven years came from — why seven years? One possibility is that it was adapted from an old wives' tale about poison ivy — that if you ever get poison ivy, the itch will return every seven years. But what Fisher seems to suggest is that humans lack the persistence of poison ivy.

So if the seven-year-itch isn't a total myth, it's just a little mistake in math.

Beat the Holiday Rush for Dates

Margot Carmichael Lester, for Match.com

There’s something about this time of year that really fires up the urge to merge.

First, there’s that pesky prehistoric hardwiring that makes us want to huddle inside our caves to safeguard ourselves against the coming darkness. Second, you can’t help but wish for a beloved with all those sappy commercials showing happy, loving couples frolicking in the snow, enjoying hot chocolate and then getting engaged. And then there’s the simple logistical element — so many parties and not an escort to be found.

Fellow singles, make a resolution right now to beat the holiday rush for partners. Here are some tips to get you on your merry way:

Makin’ a list. Checkin’ it twice.
Take an inventory of your best traits and areas in which you want to improve. Make a plan to celebrate the good points and overcome the bad ones. Then make a list of what you’re looking for in a mate and what you consider deal breakers. These exercises help you get a clearer picture of yourself and your potential partner. Having a keener focus can make it easier to find a good match.

Tip: Use this list to polish up your online dating profile, then post a new picture and pop a few emails to promising prospects.

Go out and play.
Fall and winter are great times to get outside! Check with your local Sierra Club or parks and recreation department for day hikes, ski trips and other outdoor activities.

Curl up with a good book.
Most bookstores and libraries have reading clubs organized by area of interest (creative non-fiction, romance, etc.). These groups not only expose you to great literature but also could expose you to a great mate with similar tastes.

Give to others.
Most communities offer some kind of Thanksgiving meal for homeless or impoverished people. Why not sign up to do some advance work or to serve food on the big day? You’ll be doing something good for the community and will meet other volunteers with the same sensibilities. And even if you don’t make a love connection, the experience will ensure you don’t take your own good fortune for granted.

‘Tis the season.
Plan a Jingle Bells, Single Belles party for your uninvolved friends. In addition to bringing a toy or cash donation for a charity, each guest must bring another single person. This way, you expand your dating pool while getting into the spirit of the season.

Of course, the most convenient way to meet singles with your interests is from your computer! Check out your local dating sites and start searching for someone to share the holidays with.

LINKS TO ONLINE DATING SITES

Match.com

Quebec, Home to the Post Modern Marriage

The results of last week's presidental elections has sent shivers up the spines of many a progressive democrat.  Many are thinking about heading north to Canada.  As noted in an earlier article, there are new web sites that not only provide information on living in Canada, but also providing some inspiration to marry Canadians. 

Canada has a lot to offer liberal-minded Americans including a very liberal view about relationships in the province of Quebec.  Like have a little piece of France in North America, the architechture is centuries old, the men and women ever so fashionable, and their ideas about marriage quite extraordinary.   So while you are thinking about the big move, why not consider Quebec!

Holy Matrimony!

First comes love, then comes marriage.  Now comes Quebec, proposing the World's first Post-Marriage Society.

Excerpts from Essay by Danielle Stanton for Enroute Magazine

As in the rest of the Western world, fewer people are tying the knot in Canada, especially Quebec. Quebecers are not only saying, "I do" at half the rate they did 30 years ago (20,600 marriages in 2003 compared to 50,400 in 1975), but they are also divorcing more frequently. And more Quebec couples are opting for common-law marriage than ever before (30 percent compared to 12 percent elsewhere in Canada and 8 percent in the United States). To see where relationships are headed, we need look no further than the society where the statistical pattern has already played out. Quebec is the crystal ball of North America’s marital destiny.

So why are Quebecers leading this revolution of postconjugal bliss? After the Quiet Revolution that shook Quebec politics, culture and religion in the 1960s, the province quite literally divorced itself from old institutions and embraced modernity. "In 40 years, Quebec went through the same changes that were spread out in other societies over 300 years," says Diane Pacom, a professor of sociology at the University of Ottawa. A huge Environics survey of more than 14,000 North Americans bears this out. It found that Quebec has the highest percentage of non-traditional family environments and is a breeding ground for permissive attitudes. It’s no wonder that Quebec couples are redefining the North American family.

Like picking a new car, Quebecers can select from three distinct takes on coupling: Open-ended couples are the equivalent of a flashy convertible sports car; wedding party animals are like the fun PT Cruiser; and advocates of new-and-improved marriage are as neo-traditionalist as the New Beetle. For all models, fidelity is an option.

The trick to the first variation is to reconcile being both an individual and part of a couple. "Philip has been the love of my life for the past eight years," explains Mackayla, "but we simply couldn’t live together. Our lifestyles are just too different. By living apart, we avoid a lot of arguments." Like other open-ended types, this couple keeps things fresh by deliberately injecting elements of separation and change. Racy and exciting in theory, this lifestyle can be exhausting in practice, as the partners are constantly wondering, "Have I made the right choice? What if the grass is greener…?" Instead of "All for one and one for all," the motto is more like "You for you, and me for me."

LINK TO FULL ARTICLE

Holy Matrimony!

Democrats:  Why Not Come to Canada

LINK TO MENTIONED SITES
Marry an American

Canadianalternative.com

LINK TO ANOTHER AMERICAN DATING SITE

American Singles